Happy Valentine's Day

Dave took this picture at the zoo a couple of weeks ago and I have been saving it for Valentine's Day. Doesn't looking at it just make you want to be in love, fall in love, or stay in love? Even tigers seem to enjoy their relationship. Pardon me while I get on my soapbox for a minute. I have spent a lot of years getting an education and I have learned that married people are happier, healthier (mentally and physically), live longer, accumulate more assets, have more frequent and more fulfilling sex, raise children with fewer problems and I could go on and on. (You probably already knew all that without paying tuition for years and years.) I wish everyone had a happy marriage--think of what a different place the world would be with just this one change. I heard once that a happy marriage was the absolute best state to be in, however, an unhappy marriage was the worst way to live. So for anyone that is living a very miserable life in an unhappy marriage, I would say get some help. If there is abuse or addictions or infidelity--make sure you are safe and get some wise counsel to make a good choice about staying or leaving. For the other 70% of marriages that end in divorce and don't have major problems, learn to have a great marriage instead of giving up. Marriages with even major problems can become very happy. The majority of couples that stay together and work things out end up being very happy five years later. Get counseling, read a good marriage book, start going on weekly dates, make a list of all the good qualities of your spouse, do something thoughtful for your sweetheart every day and see what happens.

I have advice for those that are single also. The same BYU professor that said a happy marriage was the happiest way to live also said that being happily single was the next happiest way to go through life. Being unhappily single was behind that and being unhappily married was the worst state of being. So, if you are still going it alone, learn to be happy on the journey. The happier you are as a single person will greatly affect how happy you are when you marry--not to mention the quality of your life now. If you are sad and lonely, know that being sad and lonely in a marriage is harder to deal with and harder to change. So, make good friends, develop fulfilling hobbies and talents, get a good education. Spend time pursuing a fulfilling career, you will never be able to devote as much time after you are married. Travel, volunteer, become an expert on something that interests you. Be so engaged in living a good life that you make your married friends jealous. I loved the Valentine's parties that Megan had before she was married. She would invite all her unattached friends and they would really enjoy themselves for the day. Instead of sitting home feeling miserable they would have massages or pedicures and watch fun movies and eat good food. Life really is what we choose to make it.

To my special Valentine--I love you with all my heart. Thanks for 30 wonderful years. To anyone else that may read this, I wish you a life of love and happiness. Happy Valentine's Day.